MM Dix-Neuf: Pregnant in France

The day we found out...Friendsgiving!

It's been a loooonnngg time since I've done a Monday Minute, but I finally have a good topic for one again. Being pregnant in France has come with its challenges, but also its positives. Granted, I've never gone through pregnancy in the US before, but I'm going to attempt to outline some of the differences I've seen so far, some good, some frustrating!

*Cost*

Yep, 55E for monthly lab work & preliminary genetic screening, with NO INSURANCE

Ok, this the American in me coming out. I have friends from Canada and the UK who would not agree with me on this point, but when your reference is American health care costs, yes, France is cheap. Since we still have American insurance, rather than the French social health care, we pay everything at full price out of pocket and then submit claims to our US company after the fact. While this is time consuming, tons of paperwork, and results in a 4 month delay of reimbursement, I don't mind because it's so cheap to begin with. I'm talking 100E, no insurance, for a monthly appointment with my OBGYN {who is the head of the maternity at a well-known hospital in Paris} including an ultrasound {which is also in 3D for part of the time!}. I mean, what?!?

*High Quality of Care*

As far as I can tell, the quality of care here is just as good, if not better than in the US. For example, usually in the US, a tech does your ultrasounds when pregnant and the doctor reviews the images and videos. {I know this is not always the case, but often.} Here my doctor does the ultrasounds himself, which is very reassuring to know that nothing is being missed. Our particular doctor lived in England for several years developing many of the initial ultrasound screenings for genetic disorders before moving back to France. And I got an appointment with him with no problems and no waiting game. THIS WOULD NOT HAPPEN IN THE US...a doctor who's an expert in his/her field...good luck! You better know some people who can pull some strings for you!

*Lab work*

This is one aspect of the French system that is very different to me. Although the hospitals do have some lab capacities within them, you often still have to go to a private lab for monthly lab work. This is particularly true when you are just seeing a generalist doctor {more on that below}. It was not my proudest moment when the first "shop" in my neighborhood to recognize me by name was my lab, not my boulangerie or boucherie. Oh, and yes, it's totally normal to carry your pee around in a cup/in your purse to and from the lab. Why? Because France. That's why. Actually, it makes a lot of sense...they give me a new cup when I leave so that the next month I have one ready to go. Then there's none of the chugging water before leaving for the lab and hoping to be able to fill the cup once I get there!

*Laid back*

I learned very early on in this pregnancy that French are definitely more laid back about letting pregnancy progress than Americans. Granted my only experience with pregnancy in America is stories I've heard through friends, but I think this holds true. To illustrate, when I took my first three {yes, three!} positive pregnancy tests, I immediately called my doctor for an appointment that day. Because so many of my friends told me that they went to their doctor and took a blood/urine test in the office to confirm it on the spot. So I arrived at my doctor, she congratulates me, proceeds to estimate my due date, go over the do's/don't's of pregnancy, and writes me a prescription for the full blood work needed when you're pregnant, and hands me the bill for the appointment. Trying to comprehend what just happened, I timidly ask "So, are we going to do a urine or blood test to confirm I'm actually pregnant?" She smiles at me and says, "If you've taken three positive home tests, trust me, you're pregnant. There's no need for a separate blood test other than your full blood test that you'll next week." I left dumbfounded and spent the weekend wondering if I was really pregnant. Of course, it turns out I was, confirmed by the full blood work a week later.

Another thing that's different is that generally, most pregnant women continue seeing their generalist until 6 months, assuming there's no complications, at which point they switch to an OBGYN or a midwife for the remainder of the pregnancy. And honestly, this makes a lot of sense. Other than your ultrasounds, the monthly appointments are literally 10-15 minutes: blood pressure check, weight check, question answering, au revoir! I mean, really, when did America go away from this tradition to seeing an OBGYN from the get-go? Unless there's a problem, doesn't it make sense to stay with someone who knows you? Oh, and by the way, those ultrasounds? The 1st one in France is 12-13 weeks, NOT 8-10 weeks. Again America seems to go overboard on this too. As hard as it was to wait that long, it actually looked like a real baby at that point, not a blob!

That glass of wine that you're used to drinking to unwind? It's definitely not completely off the table here. While no one's recommending you have a glass every day, they definitely are okay with it from time to time. And if you were to order one in a restaurant, you would not get the shocked, judging stares you would in the US.

The thing that has been the hardest for me to get used to in terms of being laid back here is the smoking. It is NOT recommended that pregnant women smoke in France either, but the amount of second-hand smoke they must ingest is crazy to me. I feel like I'm constantly holding my breath as I walk by smokers on the sidewalk. And the strangest thing? Smoking is allowed immediately outside the maternity wing at the hospital. And I do mean immediately.

*Maternity clothes shopping*

Oh, like many things in France, this was quite an adventure. This was one of the times I really wished for the American convenience of the a mall and all its American stores. Instead, I traipsed across most of Paris for 5-6 hours, quite unsuccessfully. Turns out, only a handful of H&M stores have a maternity section in Paris, despite the fact that there's on H&M nearly every few blocks. GAP, which advertised having maternity clothes in stores, now only sells them online. Oh, and specialty maternity stores? I can count them on one hand.

So what do French women do? I'm still not entirely sure, but I think it must be a combination of boutique shopping and online shopping. I finally found jeans I liked at a wonderful maternity boutique called MammaFashion {in an empty alleyway...no one would ever stumble into this shop!} because although H&M has quite a selection of maternity pants, 80% of them are flare or loose fitting on the bottom. NEWS FLASH...I have never seen a Parisian wearing anything other than skinny jeans, so why would they switch for maternity pants?? The rest of my jeans and leggings I ordered online at GAP. Thankfully, I discovered a site, which allows for free shipping and free returns, without paying the exorbitant taxes/import fees associated with many American websites/companies. But workout pants....yeah, that one is still stumping me....probably because most Parisian women don't work out, let alone when they're pregnant...

*Bathrooms*

Any pregnant lady knows how important bathrooms are. In France, it's even more important since there's very few public ones. I will say, I think I know where all free ones are now {there's even a secret, clean one in the walls of Seine}, and I know to make sure to use the restroom at any restaurant, museum, or event I'm at before leaving. You never know how long you might have to wait for the next one!

My running route now includes a pit stop at my hospital in the middle since I can't seem to go more than 1-2 miles without needing a bathroom. I've decided the key is to act confident when walking in somewhere to find a bathroom. Now that I know where they are in the hospital, I just stroll in and use them, despite the looks I get coming in drenched sweat and wearing workout clothes.

*Being a pregnant foreigner in France*

This has definitely been the hardest thing for me. I always thought not drinking would be the hardest thing with all the good wine, champagne, etc. in France, but it turns out, it's the food! Since so much of French food culture revolves around charceturie meats and unpasteurized cheese, it's hard not being able to eat those things! I have found a decent selection of pasteurized cheeses in the grocery store, but eating any of those things out is impossible because you don't know if they're pasteurized or not! Thankfully, my friends here are awesome and always save the labels for me and try and buy at least one pasteurized cheese every time we get together! :)

France also has a high prevalence of toxoplasmosis. This is the same disease that pregnant women can get from cat litter, but for some reason is found in high quantities in France {perhaps because the French eat a lot of raw and under-cooked meat}. This means, that either before getting pregnant, or immediately after finding out, every pregnant women is tested to see if they have immunity to toxoplasmosis. Most French women do, since they have lived their whole lives eating foods from the soil here and likely contracted it sometime in their lives. {If you contract toxoplasmosis when not pregnant, it is harmless and results in life-long immunity.} However, most foreigners are not immune, and I was one of those who was not immune when tested. This means, not only do I take a monthly blood test to check that I haven't contracted it while pregnant, but I always have to avoid the soil and not eat any raw veggies or meats! I've never thought of myself has a veggie person, but when taken away, I realize how much I actually them! No salads, no veggies and humus, no raw salsa, ugh! I'm having to get creative with how I get my veggie requirements in nowadays!

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UPDATE: June 1, 2015

Just a few more funny/interesting notes.

*Life in a Folder*

No joke, you carry your life around in a folder for every appointment you have. Heaven forbid you forget your folder when you go into labor--it has every record of your entire pregnancy from lab results to ultrasounds to the doctor's scribbled notes from monthly appointments. While this is great for me, who needs all my records back in the US anyway, it seems stressful for someone living here!

*Clothes, or Lack Thereof*

The first time we showed up for an ultrasound and the doctor told me to take off my pants and underwear for the ultrasound, I knew he meant right there and then; there would be no gown, as in the US. This is a French norm that I had experienced on my first every doctor visit in France, but for Nick was all very new. I remember him looking shocked and confused, like perhaps he didn't hear something correctly.  He rolled with it, but afterwards told me how strange he thought it was. Now, 5 months later, he's used to it to at every appointment!

Speaking of clothes, I attend a weekly pre-natal yoga class that's enitrely in French, which means I'm essentially the only non-French person there. While I show up in my yoga pants, all the other women show up in normal clothes {because riding the metro or being seen in public in work out clothes is a faux-pas in Paris}. However, despite the fact they wouldn't be caught dead in workout clothes outside the studio, it doesn't bother them one bit to come into the studio and strip down in front of everyone to put on their yoga clothes. I mean, really?

*Bureaucracy*

Oh, yes, like everything else in France, there's bureaucracy frustrations. Whether it's wandering the hospital because three different people tell you three different things about where you should go {no one seems to ever be in the same page in France}, or waiting 1 hour to pay a 20E bill, it's always something. Yes, to pay my 20E bill from lab work in the hospital, I had to go there. Reverting to my American self, I mistakenly thought it would be a quick pop in and out type of visit. Oh no, please take a number and we will call you, when we feel like it...There were so many times when a window sat empty for 5 minutes before they called another number! Ughh! Where is my American efficiency??

*Treated Like a Queen*

Despite many of these bizarre and sometimes annoying traits, I will say, pregnant women are treated like queens in France. I can't tell you how many times someone has given up their seat on the metro or bus, or let me cut in line {gotta take advantage while I can!} Plus, there's priority lines at the grocery store and post office for pregnant ladies. And if you happen to wait in a non-priority line, and someone notices you, they will pulll you out of line to check out immediately. Well done, France, well done. America could take some clues in this department!

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All in all, it's not so bad being pregnant in France, other than missing out on our last few months of enjoying French wine, cheese, and meats, of course! I love how laid back the French are about pregnancy; I feel like it's helped make me less stressed and helped lead to an overall easy pregnancy so far. I will say that I look forward to future pregnancies in the US, where I don't have to worry about weather cheese is pasteurized/unpasteurized and eating fruits and vegetables with no worries!

MM Vingt: S-s-summertime, summertime {happiness}

Last summer was a little strange because there was no clear distinction between my normal life and summer life.  As a teacher, that utter joy you feel on your first day of summer is something I always looked forward to.  So, this year, although not quite the same as my teaching days, I once again got to experience what the excitement of summer feels like again.  My daily French classes and after-school English classes that I taught ended within the last two weeks, so it's freedom! :)  And to paraphrase Lana Del Ray, it's been a s-s-summertime, summertime of happiness (not sadness!)

So what have I/we been up to?  Nick's mostly been in Africa working offshore 16-18 hours a day.  He's having fun {more on that later}, and so I am back in Paris.

MM Dix-Neuf: The French Pool Experience

It's been quite a while since I've done a Monday Minute, so here goes!

Last week we had a gorgeous warm, blue sky day, so knowing it was the last nice day forecast for quite a while my friends, Katie and Val, and I decided to hit up a French public swimming pool.

MM Seize: A Dr. Visit...in my apartment?

Finally! Another Monday minute, and its a good one!!

MM Quatorze: May in Paris Courtesy of the iPhone

Just a little glimpse of the last few weeks in Paris through the eyes of my iPhone.  Even though it hasn't been the nicest weather (downright winter-like, in fact), we've had a blast the past few weeks with friends and events around the city.  It's really starting to feel like home, which is good, because we are getting ready to welcome visitors again this weekend!!

MM Treize: Rain, Rain, Go Away!

So, I bet you didn't know I moved to London....

Every day I check my phone and I think, "Oh yes, today will be the day that I see sun in the forecast" and instead I just see more and more rain! :(  This is what I think of when I think of London weather.  But I'm quickly realizing Paris weather is very similar to London weather!

I mean, I know I shouldn't be complaining, I live in a city that's still beautiful in the rain, but COME ON....weeks of rain on end and cold temperatures are not fun.  It's almost June people!  Right now, I'm just looking forward to Wednesday...

MM Douze: Spring has Sprung!

Finally a new Monday Minute!  But, it might have to hold you over for a while---Saturday our first visitors from the U.S. come and I'll be traveling next week with them! :)

I know the Midwest is having a hard time shaking winter, so hopefully this will give you hope of what's to come!  (Texas, well....I mean, you never really had winter to start with!)

MM Onze: Not So Perfect Prefecture

We've heard over and over again from other ex-pats things like: "Nothing in France is easy." and "Oh, that's just France!" regarding things like moving in, dealing with any state departments, and just all around getting things done.  So we moved here waiting to feel like we needed to say these phrases.  But 3 months went by and everything seemed to go smoothly!  People were very nice, and when we did have problems, they were either taken care of easily or so minor that we decided it wasn't worth the hassle.

But, alas, my prefecture experience finally made me say "Oh, France..."

MM Dix: la télévision

TV. We did without it for a year when we were in Houston and did just fine. But TV is much different here in France!

MM Neuf

My last week has primarily been filled with travel plans...I know tough life I have!  And I've found that even though I live in France now, much is the same!

MM Huit: Feeling Settled

It's now March (where did February go??), and we're starting to really feel like Paris is home.  We got some the last big things marked off our "list" (which seems as if it's been never ending since October) this week.

MM Sept: Kids & French

Today's Monday Minute is brought on by the laughs I had with my little kiddos at school today!  Mondays are seriously my favorite day because I get to the spend the morning with 3 year olds and the afternoon with 1st graders at the bilingual school I volunteer at.

MM Six: The Doctor

I had my first experience with a French doctor this past week.  This may be a bit of an awkward post, but I'll try to keep it comical too! :)

MM Cinq

I have learned a lot in the last month, especially the last week, about the challenges associated with cooking and baking in a country with recipes from a different country.

MM 4: Coins & French

I almost forgot it was Monday! Just got back from our Italy trip today (post on that coming soon), so it was a busy day filled with laundry and grocery shopping, exciting, I know.

Todays tidbits are travel related:

*Coin purses are essential here but incredibly hard to find! In America when we get change at a store, I'm sure we all do the same thing: throw it in a pocket, a cup holder of the car, or eventually find it in the bottom of the couch. Little thought is given to it (unless you finally round it up and take it to a coinstar machine). Here, I hold onto change like no other! It is not uncommon to have 10-15 euros (or more) of change at a time since the smallest bill here is 5 euros. Takes a little getting used to, and I'm pretty sure cashiers could rip me off if they wanted to because I still have no idea which coin is which when they hand me a pile! The strangest part is that I looked in about 10 stores before I even found a coin purse. What do Europeans do? Maybe they just prefer to find $20 in the couch compared to our $2, I don't know!

*I never thought I would be so happy to hear French. Even though the majority of French still sounds completely foreign to me, I found myself drawn to everything written in French while in Italy. And if I heard someone speaking French? It felt like I was at home! I think this must be a good sign, right? (I'll just choose to ignore the fact that when I went to buy my train ticket home from the Paris airport today, I froze for about 2 minutes, completely forgetting how to speak any French!)

MM Trois: Trains & Socks

Happy Monday!  It's a busy week--met some cool French and American kiddos at the school I'll be volunteering at this morning and meet some cool new friends at the first event I attended with the American Women's Group this afternoon.  Just getting home now and leaving for Italy tomorrow (and not yet packed), so this is going to be short and sweet post today.

Trains:
We love, love the metro system here.  It is easy to use and gets you where you need to be fairly quickly.  I may be such a fan in the summer when it's hot and everyone is crammed in so you have smelly, sweaty people in your face, but for now, I love it!  BUT, don't throw away (or lose) your ticket after you go through the turnstile.  Police randomly check trains and at stations to make sure you have a valid ticket.  And if you don't--automatic fine.  We're not talking about 50 bucks, even a 100 bucks, we're talking 150-300 EUROS. Yikes!  Surprisingly, a large number of people still jump the turnstiles, but I'm too terrified to let go of the death grip on my ticket, let alone jump the turnstile!

Socks:
I have thrown away 6 pairs of socks since I've been here.  It seems like everyday when I take off my boots, there's a hole in one of them!  I know I do much more walking here than I ever did in the US, but it's starting to get ridiculous!  I'm about to go to the market to buy some new socks, I'm almost out.  I think it's partially due to the fact that I have an abnormal big toe that curls upward, but even if you don't have a weird big toe, I'd suggest bringing lots of socks when you come to visit! :)

Monday Minute Deux

Happy Monday! It's a cold, gray, rainy day here today, which means our snow will be gone by the end of the day :(

Monday Minute

Welcome to the Monday Minute...every Monday I plan to update 2-3 "nuggets of wisdom" that I've learned since I've been here. It might be a funny story that happened to us, or it might just be something that's different from life in the U.S. Be sure to check back every Monday :)